First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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