I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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