found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
cat food counts as protein by the way
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
