he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
