ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
