I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize