I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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