you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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