We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
