i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
