Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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