sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize
