how can u be prego again
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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