I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
