hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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