Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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