Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
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