where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
