what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
