Where is the hickey?
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Randomize
