If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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