guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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