She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
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