Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
