Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
