The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
