Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
