Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
