Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
