Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
