I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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