well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
i believe in u and ur pee
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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