I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize