I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
