No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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