were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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