I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
