eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Randomize
