I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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