oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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