took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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