Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
