I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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