C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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