a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
