just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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