It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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