I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Randomize
