my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
