Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
