My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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