So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
